You know the saying, it's funny 'cause it's true...
Eats organic pureed vegetables as first food, and for pretty much the first 6 months.
Nappy changed every time the line on the fancy nappy turns blue.
Your favourite online stores to browse when you’re up late at night with bubs, are baby clothing stores and blogs about gentle parenting techniques.
By age one hasn’t eaten processed food or refined sugars.
Weekly schedule includes library time, swimming lessons, mums group, tumble tots and mini maestros.
TV limited to Play School each afternoon while dinner (which is nutritious AF) gets cooked.
Their best friend is you, and their comforter.
You use Milestone Cards to document their every move, and regularly post updates to Instagram and Facebook.
Eats whatever older sibling gives them as their first food – usually peanut butter or egg.
Nappy changed morning and night, unless there’s a poo, but even that isn’t urgent.
(No fancy blue line on budget nappies).
Your favourite online store to browse any time of the day or night is Dan Murphy’s.
First birthday party held at McDonalds, if you get time to have one.
Wait, what day is it?
Watches ABC kids back to back on an iPad, while you drive around aimlessly just to get some time when you don't have to entertain kids.
Their best friend is Siri.
You only remember their Milestones because the Health Nurse calls you every so often, to let you know you have missed another appointment.
Turns out the jokes on me though - the second one is WAY more chilled out...