So I thought it was time to have a bit of fun around here and give you something a bit light hearted for Thursday evening reading - parenting is stressful enough hey!?
So here it is, in true Seriously Milestones style, the 10 things that I have learnt since becoming a mum - enjoy!
1. Despite what you’re serving, food is always better if it is referred to as a ‘snack’ – if you mention the words breakfast, lunch, or dinner, you’ve just guaranteed that it won’t be eaten.
2. You're kids won't listen to a single word you say, unless you swear. They will pick that shit up like no ones business and repeat it (in context) at every opportunity.
3. You were never, ever tired until now. Even when you were tired, it wasn’t like this. There is no longer a word that describes what you’re feeling.
4. You’re level of what is acceptable has dropped so low that you don’t ever remember having standards. This is across the board – the state of your house, what you can use as a tissue, how long something can be eaten after it’s been on the floor…
5. If the world somehow ran out of concrete, left over weet bix and porridge would be an appropriate substitute.
6. If your kid is constipated and you need them to poo, take their nappy off and let them play on a couch/carpeted area.
7. Similarly, if you’re in a rush to go out, your kid will poo.
8. Kid won’t eat their dinner? Just brush their teeth, should do the trick. Didn’t work? Tell them it’s bed time and they’ll be suddenly hungry.
9. If you can’t get your kids attention, go to the toilet. They’ll be there in no time at all and you'll have their undivided attention for as long as you're sitting there with your pants down.
10. And, just when you think you've got them figured out, they change - so good luck!
Have your own experiences you'd like to share? I'd love to hear them!
Hit me up on firstname.lastname@example.org